man your battle stations, we'll have you dead pretty soon

[tadeadshi]

[Panic had run straight through his core when he knew someone had found their safe house. It'd been the best one yet, they had managed to stay there for months now, but it really was too good to last. They still had so much to find and clean up, he wasn't ready. He grabs his bag, the one he kept packed for if they had to run fast, and made for the door but stopped just outside.

It was them. It was the Six, they'd found him and Callaghan. He's not sure how, Callaghan's mods to his collar had jammed their trackers so... It must be something else they used. But if they're here then they could help. They could take over this mess, and he could go home.

Maybe.

Tadashi's throat's gone dry with the dirt and dust kicked up from their landing and scuffle with Callaghan off to the side and he stands watching, swallowing the lump in his throat. Callaghan, that's right, he-- He'd done so much to get them out, he couldn't let the guy just be taken back to prison, he'd be killed from the inside --

He makes a run towards the group, waving and trying to call out but any sound he makes drowned by the shouting.]

Comments

[tadeadshi]

[Breathe. In, four, out, four. He makes it to "two" before the shaking starts and he can't get it under control. Callaghan. Callaghan always, that's who he needs. Not the big pillow of a robot stepping closer and carefully enveloping him, a slow, steady pulse vibrating from Baymax's frame. Tadashi zeroes in on that pulse, almost like a heartbeat, and gradually, slowly, his breathing begins to slow. It's still shaky and unsure, but not frantic.

His vision comes back to what's in front of him and he blinks back tears. Realizes Hiro's watching him and lowers his gaze, leans his head against Baymax, still synchronizing his breathing to the pulse Baymax is giving out.]

[microbrobotics]

[ Callaghan or Baymax but not his brother. When did Hiro become such a complete failure at people? He'd been doing well, having friends and leading a superhero team ... but not well enough to know how to get close to his brother again. What's the point if he can't do that...?

And then he kicks himself mentally for daring to feel sorry for himself when his brother's having a panic attack. Squishing his feelings down, he steps just a little big closer. Still keeping the bot between himself and his brother. ]

You can stay with him if you want.

[tadeadshi]

[It's a few more minutes before Tadashi responds, still evening his breath, mentally counting to ten as best he can. Count with me. He counts the pulses he feels from Baymax instead. When he finds his voice, it's thick. Wet and upset and trying to keep it steady.]

Sorry. I'm-- I'm sorry.

[microbrobotics]

It's not your fault, Tadashi. It's - it's the fault of whoever did all that to you.

[ And Hiro is going to destroy them. ]

[tadeadshi]

[Once he's got a steady breathing pattern for himself again, he eases off Baymax to sit up straight. Hiro's words though - they get his attention and he looks to his little brother, expression lost and for all the world like they've switched places. That Tadashi is the little brother shoved into lockers and no way to change it, Hiro the older brother looking out.

It doesn't sit well with him.

This wouldn't be so bad if he'd managed that second escape, the one before Callaghan was brought in. Sure the shock had been bad enough to drop him to the ground but he should've kept crawling. Should've kept doing something to get out. He's not looking at anything now, staring blank at some spot on the screen-separator between their spaces.]

Should've kept running.

[microbrobotics]

[ They have switched place, haven't they? Tadashi's the one hurt and mentally scarred; Hiro trying to take the brunt of the rest of the world without necessarily letting his brother know that's what's going on. Except both their roles are at such, such high stakes now. One mistake and they're both irrevocably lost.

Hiro shakes his head slowly. ]

Like I should have run from my bullies as a kid? Just gotten myself out of the locker?

[tadeadshi]

[He ducks his head down, rests his hands at the base of his neck shaking his head.]

Not what I meant.

[Deep, slow breath. Deep, slow exhale.]

Where I was. I tried to get out. Twice. [Another breath. Breathe.] Second time I almost got out, but... [He taps a finger to the collar at his neck.] ...Should've just kept running anyway.

[microbrobotics]

[ He opens his mouth to say I've seen you get shocked, I know how bad it is-- but manages to bite back that little piece of incriminating commentary before it passes his lips. Instead, he bows his head. ]

Those lightning scars are from that, right?

[tadeadshi]

[Quietly:] ...Yeah. They're from that.

[microbrobotics]

[ He hesitates. This is a risky move, since who knows if Tadashi will recognize the weapon used to cause it. But ... Well, he works with dangerous tech all the time. Perfectly normal for a kid in a lab. He tucks down his own shirt a bit, exposing a smaller, singular lichtenberg figure down the side of one arm. ]

Bad shock in my lab. Didn't want to move afterward. And you've got so much worse...

[tadeadshi]

[It takes a minute for him to process that Hey Hiro is trying to show you something, look up. When it does, he carefully lifts his head looking Hiro over before he finds where he's supposed to look and -- Oh. Oh, Hiro, little brother. He holds his hand out, wordlessly asking to see it closer.]

Jeez... Probably took out half the lab with you if it was bad enough to leave a mark.

[microbrobotics]

[ Hiro approaches, angling his shoulder to let Tadashi see more clearly. And simultaneously make sure his brother can't see the other scars lurking just out of sight ... it's definitely from an electrical shock. Single point of entry. ]

Pretty much, yeah. But Baymax was right there, at least.

[tadeadshi]

[He lets his fingertips hover just over his arm, but never touching. But jeez that's- God, that's horrible looking.]

I'm-- I'm glad he was. Might've... Your arm, I mean, if he hadn't been.

[microbrobotics]

[ A hard one to get by accident, as Tadashi knows intimately. Hiro rolls his shoulder a bit and smiles faintly. ]

Would've been a good excuse to build myself a robot arm.

[tadeadshi]

[The longer he looks at it, the more confused he's getting about it and the confusion's obvious the way his brows scrunch together. But then Hiro shrugs his arm and his attention's pulled away.]

Let's... not? Let's not. Think you're better with this arm.

[microbrobotics]

Aww, come on. I'd build myself something sick.

[ He tugs his shirt back up and leans away lightly. If Tadashi's making those faces, it's only a matter of time before he realizes that the scar is from one of his knockout weapons... ]

[tadeadshi]

Feel better if you kept the real arm. No chance of it gaining sentience.

[microbrobotics]

[ That gets an actual laugh. ]

Oh ye of little faith.

... Anyway, it's fine now. Just a cool scar for me. But I know it hurts.

[tadeadshi]

[Ah.

And now they're back to him.]

Shouldn't've let it stop me.

[microbrobotics]

Tadashi, I don't think you had much of a choice.

[tadeadshi]

[Tadashi opens his mouth to protest that but --

No choice.

That's what he'd thought at the time when it happened too. Then Callaghan came along and fought tooth and nail to give Tadashi hope, then tore it down again when he donned the Yokai persona again, then got them out.

But there hadn't been any choice, had there? What else was he supposed to do. What is is he supposed to do.]

[microbrobotics]

[ Even without his brother saying anything, Hiro can guess what his brother's thinking. The trick is to say the right thing without saying too much ... ]

I know you'd have come home sooner if you could have.

[tadeadshi]

[He swallows the lump in his throat, gripping at his sleeve.]

I still should've found a different way. It's--

[It doesn't matter now. He is home, even if he's a broken up mess. He takes a slow steady inhale and holds it a few seconds. Home means family. Home means friends, and the thought that he's keeping his being alive secret from them is enough to hurt.]

...Dunno if I'm ready to see the others yet.

[microbrobotics]

[ A different way? When they were doing that to him? Hiro just falls silent for a moment, letting his brother talk past the topic. Ah, that's a little safer. He can respond to that. ]

They can wait, Tadashi. Trust me. They'll understand.

[tadeadshi]

They'll want to know.

[Gogo especially. He knows she hates being left in the dark. And Tadashi's not sure she'd just let him slide with vague answers.]

Have you told them yet?